Working for the government

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Time for a song

Walk right in, sit on down
And bake yourself at home
Come on baby, you're just like peas
And you hate to be alone (pass the carrots)

It's funny how things go around
It's crazy but it's true
This plate is empty, oh so empty
It's empty without stew

Come on, bake your chicken breasts
And make me feel at home
You and me we're just like all the rest
And we don't want to be...umm, hungry

It's funny how things go around
But go around they do
This plate is empty, empty
So empty without stew
It's empty without stew

Come on potatoes, simmer down
And treat me sweet taters and cool
At least by now you have learned
How to love to drool

Our trip to the museum..

Cake, Hoagy and I went to the War Museum yesterday...we told Hoagy not to touch anything, but oh that Hoagy, he just had to! I don't think he was supposed to try on the artifacts...

Roger taking a picture of Cake taking a picture of Roger

The real story

aka. A Very Short Story About Vanquishing Flying Squirrels

This morning, Cake was in the bathroom getting ready to have a shower...when, suddenly, the shower curtain moved.

Cake stopped what Cake was doing and looked at it.

It moved a little more."Good god," Cake thought to herself, "how goddamn big would a raccoon or Bear have to be to move the curtain!?" Cake pulled the shower curtain back, a little nervously, and saw both her flying squirrels sitting in the middle of the bathtub, bolt upright, staring at her.

Cake stared back. They had a staring contest.

And then Cake leaned slowly over, without blinking, and started the hot water. While they kept staring at her....And then the water reached their delicate paws and they bailed out of the tub in a huge flurry of screeching and fur and "OhMyGodWe'reGonnaDie!" noises.

And that's how Cake vanquished the flying squirrels.

"How come you're so talkative? "

I almost stepped in dog poo

This morning.

And nobody cares.

Telling someone that you ALMOST stepped in dog poo is worse than telling someone about a dream you had.

Almost stepped in dog poo stories are the all time worst stories. Why? BECAUSE NOTHING HAPPENS. You DIDN'T STEP IN DOG POO!!! And neither did most people that day.

Don't tell me about it. Nothing happened. And I certainly don't want to hear a story with the punchline of nothing happening. So go crap up your shoe and tell me about it....I'll be all severed ears. But if you avoid said accident maybe you can go write it in your diary. Though even Dear Diary doesn't care.

(I once dreamed about almost stepping in dog poo....I almost stepped into a vat of pudding after said vat sprouted wings. Or something. Thank god I caught my balance, huh?)


oh and thanks to this person and that person