Would you like a beard with that?

For No Oprah

Hoagy Bear goes to the Oscars...

Top secret

If I had an Eel

I would call him Edward the Eel and he would wear a top hat and spats!

Thank you!

It's a party!

Dear Me: Happy Birthday!!!
Pass the cake please.

Cake will get this!

Happy Valentines Day

Jeremiah was a bull frog
Was a good friend of mine
I never understood a single word he said
But I helped him a-drink his wine
And he always had some mighty fine wine

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls, now
Joy to the Tishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

If I were the King of the world
Tell you what I'd do
I'd throw away the cars and the bars and the wars
And make sweet love to you

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls, now
Joy to the Tishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

You know I love the ladies
Love to have my funI'm a high night flier and a rainbow rider
And a straight-shooting son of a gun
I said a staight shootin son of a gun

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls, now
Joy to the Tishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls, now
Joy to the Tishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

Random quote of the day...week...month

Long John Silver disappears. A pause. Two boxers appear. they circle each other. On one's head a bowler hat appears, vanishes. On the other's a stove-pipe hat appears. On the first's head a fez. The stove-pipe hat becomes a Stetson. The fez becomes a cardinal's hat. The Stetson becomes a wimple. Then the cardinal's hat and the wimple vanish. One of the boxers becomes Napoleon and the other boxer is astonished. Napoleon punches the boxer with the hand inside his jacket. The boxer falls, stunned. Horizontally he shoots off stage. Shot of cat, watching unimpressed. Napoleon does one-legged pixilated dance across stage and off, immediately reappearing on other side of stage doing same dance in same direction. He reaches the other side, but is halted by a traffic policeman. The policeman beckons onto the stage a man in a penguin skin on a pogo-stick. The penguin gets halfway across and then turns into a dustbin. Napoleon hops off stage. Policeman goes to dustbin, opens it and Napoleon gets out. Shot of cat, still unmoved. A nude man with a towel round his waist gets out of the dustbin. Napoleon points at ground. A chair appears where he points. The nude man gets on to the chair, jumps in the air and vanishes. Then Napoleon points to ground by him and a small cannon appears. Napoleon fires cannon and the policeman disappears. The man with the towel round his waist gets out of the dustbin and is chased off stage by the penguin on the pogo-stick. A sedan chair is carried on stage by two chefs. The man with the towel gets out and the penguin appears from the dustbin and chases him off. Napoleon points to sedan chair and it changes into dustbin. Man in towel runs back on to stage and jumps in dustbin. He looks out and the penguin appears from the other dustbin and hits him on the head with a raw chicken. Shot of cat still unimpressed. Napoleon, the man with the towel round his waist, the policeman, a boxer, and a chef suddenly appear standing in a line, and take a bow. They immediately change positions and take another bow. The penguin appears at the end of the line with a puff of smoke. Each one in turn jumps in the air and vanishes. Shot of passive cat.

Some helpful advice...

(www.toothpastefordinner.com)

That's better!

Who be this???

FYI

I have re-gained control...


Sincerely,
Roger the Shrubber

ps I'm watching you!